Hey there, friend! Let’s sit down with a drink—coffee, wine, or whatever suits you—and get real about something we’ve all been told is a miracle: birth control pills. Yep, those tiny tablets that claim to be the answer to all your pregnancy-prevention prayers but might also come with a side order of risks that no one’s really talking about. Let’s dive into the real deal about birth control pill risks, shall we?
Cardiovascular dangers: more than just a side effect
First up on the list of hidden dangers: cardiovascular disease. Birth control pills are supposed to keep you safe from unwanted pregnancies, but they might also be setting you up for some serious heart trouble. We’re talking about venous thrombosis—aka blood clots that can block your veins and potentially cause fatal issues if they travel to your lungs or brain. And don’t think you’re in the clear if you just smoke “occasionally” or are on the wrong side of 35—those habits, combined with the pill, can significantly raise your risk of heart attacks and strokes. In fact, these pills are notorious for increasing blood pressure, which can triple your risk of hypertension. And guess what? The longer you’re on the pill, the higher the risk (Mayo Clinic) (Drugs.com)
The cancer conundrum: the risks they don’t want you to know
Now, let’s talk cancer—because birth control pills aren’t just messing with your hormones for fun. They’ve been linked to an increased risk of breast, cervical, endometrial, and ovarian cancers. But here’s the kicker: the studies are all over the place. Some research shows a higher risk of breast cancer, especially for those who start the pill young or stay on it for years. Meanwhile, other studies shrug and say the risk is negligible. But let’s not forget about cervical cancer—some research shows an increased risk, but once again, it’s a mixed bag (Mayo Clinic) (Verywell Health).
Big pharma’s dirty little secret
So, why aren’t more people talking about these risks? Simple: money. Big Pharma and the healthcare industry are raking in billions from these pills, and acknowledging all the risks could hit them where it hurts—their wallets. And let’s be real, if doctors started fully disclosing every possible danger, those prescription numbers would take a nosedive. It’s all about keeping you in the dark to keep the cash rolling in.
What are the alternatives?
Feeling a bit queasy about the pill now? Don’t worry, you’ve got options! Condoms are a tried-and-true method that doesn’t come with the hormonal risks. Plus, they protect against STIs—a win-win! Or, if you’re into tech, try cycle-tracking apps like Natural Cycles. They help you monitor your fertility naturally, giving you control without the side effects. These alternatives let you dodge the bullshit and take control of your health the natural way.
the gist
the good shit
•Pregnancy? Not Today, Satan! These tiny pills are like your best wingman in the fight against unplanned pregnancy. When taken like clockwork, they’re over 99% effective at keeping the stork far, far away
•Periods on a Schedule? Yes, Please! Ever wish Aunt Flo would stop crashing your party unannounced? Birth control pills can make your periods as predictable as your nosy neighbor. They’re lighter, less painful, and way less drama.
•Cancer Blocker (Sometimes) Surprise! These pills can actually reduce your risk of ovarian and endometrial cancers. So, while they might be a bit of a troublemaker in other areas, they do have a few redeeming qualities.
•PCOS, Meet Your Match If you’re dealing with the joys of Polycystic Ovary Syndrome (PCOS), these pills can help wrangle those wild hormones and give you back some control. Say goodbye to irregular periods and hello to sanity.
•Adios, Acne! Sick of breaking out like a teenager? Birth control pills can help clear up your skin by putting your hormones on a leash. Acne, be gone!
THE BULLSHIT
•Heart Attacks and Strokes, Oh My! Yeah, these pills might keep the babies away, but they can also increase your chances of getting a blood clot, heart attack, or stroke. Especially if you’re a smoker or rocking a few extra years. And who thought playing Russian roulette with your heart was a good idea?
•Cancer Roulette
•Sure, they lower the risk of some cancers, but they might just up the ante for others, like breast and cervical cancer. It’s like the universe saying, “You win some, you lose some!” What kind of bullshit is that?
•Metabolic Mayhem Your cholesterol and glucose levels might throw a tantrum. The pill can lower your good cholesterol (HDL) and mess with your blood sugar. Because who doesn’t love a side of metabolic chaos with their contraception?
•Hormonal Shenanigans Mood swings, libido nosedives, and yeast infections—oh joy! These little pills can make your emotions and sex drive feel like they’re on a rollercoaster designed by someone who hates fun. Welcome to the hormonal circus!
•Gallbladder Drama As if you didn’t have enough to worry about, these pills might also stir up trouble with your gallbladder. Yep, that’s right—more organs getting in on the action. Just what you needed!
•No STI Protection—Condoms Still Required If you thought these pills had your back on all fronts, think again. They don’t do squat against STIs, so you’ll still need those trusty condoms in the mix. Because nothing says fun like doubling up on protection!
•Synthetic Hormones: Synthetic hormones like estrogen have been linked to an increased risk of blood clots, stroke, and even cancer. Great.
Another synthetic hormone called drospirenone (a type of progestin) has been shown to increase potassium levels, which can cause serious heart problems, and carries a high risk of causing blood clots.
•ARTIFICIAL COLORS: Artificial colors like FD&C Yellow No. 6 have been linked to allergic reactions and behavioral issues.
•SODIUM BENZOATE: A preservative known to cause hyperactivity in children, allergic reactions, cancer (especially when combined with vitamin c) particularly leukemia, disrupt good gut bacteria, and cause oxidative stress (which contributes to cancer, heart disease, and chronic inflammation).
(Read More About Artificial Preservatives)
(Read More About Sodium Benzoate)
the verdict
Birth control pills might seem like the ultimate solution, but they come with a side of “WTF?!” that you need to know about. Weigh those pros and cons, have a chat with your doc, and for the love of all things holy, stay informed before popping those pills. Stay informed, stay empowered, and remember: knowledge is your best defense against bullshit!